Top Ten Pizza Jokes and Stories

Thanks,
Brian from PizzaSpotz

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10. A blonde went to buy a Pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. “Six please” she said, “I could never eat twelve!

9. Why did the man want to enter the pizza business? He wanted to make some dough.

8. Why did the hipster burn his lips? He ate his pizza before it was cool.

7. An American businessman goes to Japan on a business trip, but he hates Japanese food, so he asks the concierge at his hotel if there’s any place around where he can get American food. The concierge tells him he’s in luck; there’s a pizza place that just opened, and they deliver. The concierge gives the businessman the phone number, and he goes back to his room and orders a pizza. Thirty minutes later, the delivery guy shows up to the door with the pizza. The businessman takes the pizza, and starts sneezing uncontrollably. He asks the delivery man, ”What the heck did you put on this pizza?”
The delivery man bows deeply and says, ”We put on the pizza what you ordered …. pepper only.”

6. What does an aardvark like on its pizza? Ant-chovies.

5. What did the angry customer give the pizzeria owner? A pizza his mind.

4. (A pizza topping joke)
A Mushroom at the prom walks up to a girl and asks her to dance.
“I’m not dancing with you” she replies.
“Aw, come on…” the mushroom says.
“Why not? I’m a fungi!” (fun guy)

3. Once a scrambled egg walked into Aurelio’s Pizza. He asked the waiter if he could have something to drink. The waiter said “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast.”

2. What do you call it when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie? Lunar Assault

Finally, number one in our Top Ten Pizza Jokes and Stories list is ….

1. This one is a short pizza story about the FBI, a mental institution and a pizzeria:

FBI agents conducted a raid of a psychiatric hospital in San Diego that was under investigation for medical insurance fraud. After hours of reviewing thousands of medical records, the dozens of agents had worked up quite an appetite. The agent in charge of the investigation called a nearby pizza parlor with delivery service to order a quick dinner for his colleagues.
The following telephone conversation took place and was recorded by the FBI because they were taping all conversations at the hospital.

Agent: Hello. I would like to order 19 large pizzas and 67 cans of soda.
Pizza Man: And where would you like them delivered?
Agent: We’re over at the psychiatric hospital.
Pizza Man: The psychiatric hospital?
Agent: That’s right. I’m an FBI agent.
Pizza Man: You’re an FBI agent?
Agent: That’s correct. Just about everybody here is.
Pizza Man: And you’re at the psychiatric hospital?
Agent: That’s correct. And make sure you don’t go through the front doors. We have them locked. You will have to go around to the back to the service entrance to deliver the pizzas.
Pizza Man: And you say you’re all FBI agents?
Agent: That’s right. How soon can you have them here?
Pizza Man: And everyone at the psychiatric hospital is an FBI agent?
Agent: That’s right. We’ve been here all day and we’re starving.
Pizza Man: How are you going to pay for all of this?
Agent: I have my checkbook right here.
Pizza Man: And you’re all FBI agents?
Agent: That’s right. Everyone here is an FBI agent. Can you remember to bring the pizzas and sodas to the service entrance in the rear? We have the front doors locked.
Pizza Man: I don’t think so.
Agent: Click!